Let not a (male) believer hate a (female) believer…

And in the statement of the Prophet (sallallahu alayhe wa sallam) –

لا يَفْرَكْ مُؤْمِنٌ مُؤْمِنَةً إِنْ كَرِهَ مِنْهَا خُلُقاً، رَضِيَ منها خلقا آخَر

‘Let not a (male) believer hate a (female) believer, if he dislikes one of her characteristics, he is pleased with another characteristic.’ (Saheeh Muslim)

 

– there are two tremendous benefits.

One of them is: guidance in how to treat the wife, the relative, the companion, the one you have dealings with, and whoever you have a connection with or a relationship to. And it is befitting that you accustom yourself to the fact that in him (or her) there will be a flaw, deficiency, or something you dislike. So when you find that, then join between this and between that which is obligatory upon you or befitting for you based on the strength of the relationship and the preservation of the love by remembering what he (or she) has of good qualities…In this is overlooking the shortcomings and noticing the good qualities, which causes the companionship and relationship to continue and achieves ease for you.”

 

Imam as-Sa’dee’s extremely beneficial (and short) book Beneficial Means to Leading a Happy Life ( الوسائل المفيدة للحياة السعيدة), point no. 13.

Arabic text and explanation, English audio translation here:

https://sughayyirah.wordpress.com/2013/01/19/useful-means-leading-to-a-happy-life-imam-as-sadee/

(Al Wasaa’il al Mufeedah can also be found on Imam as-Sa’dee’s website:

http://www.binsaadi.com/index.php )

 

 

 

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